Not Me! Monday

I know I've been on Not Me Monday hiatus for a while, but I'm back....at least for this week. Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

This past week, I most certainly did not let my child run around a food court like a maniac while people looked on, just shaking their heads. That wasn't our son causing such havoc!

I definitely did not spend 20 minutes searching around the house for a big pile of poop that was MIA from Carter's diaper. I did not then realize he put it in his diaper champ under his diaper so when I flipped the thing, the poop smeared all over the outside of the diaper champ (you'd have to see his dirty diaper holder to really understand what I'm trying to say). Then when my dear mother came over that afternoon, she and I were most certainly not in the backyard hosing that son of a gun down. I would never expect my mom to help with such a disgusting task.

I surely did not want to pull my hair out today because Carter has been so incredibly whiny that I wanted to scream!

I did not almost bust out laughing when Carter got mad at me and then held his hand up and said "Mama, DON'T talka me" meaning Don't talk to me. Then I did not get angry that he actually did say that to me and wondered who he picked that phrase up from.

I have been searching for days for a missing bottle of Clorox spray. I most certainly did not find it when I was reaching for the Shout and accidentally sprayed some of my pants with bleach instead of Shout. Hmmmm, so that explains why Carter's little coat went from having spaghetti stain on it to a bleached out spot.

I have not cleaned up toddler vomit more the past few days than I have the past 2 1/2 years because Carter's terrible coughing fits cause him to vomit. Poor baby. Poor mommy :) And along those lines, I did not have every article of clothing I wore this week, including my socks, used as a tissue for Carter to wipe his snotty nose on. Gross. Oh the joys of motherhood....